Nobody knows...

Okay, it's time for another pity session again. Don't read on if you don't want to hear it. I don't care. :)

So, for the past few years I've been having problems with my lower back and numbness in my legs when I walk. It feels like I would imagine an epidural would feel. I have function, I can walk, but my legs and butt go completely numb.

About 3 years ago I started seeing a chiropractor for it, and then realized after about 3 months that it wasn't getting any better. I couldn't walk for more than about a block without going numb. It was expensive, and not covered by insurance, so I stopped going. Eventually the numbness went away almost entirely, so I thought I was fine.

This past spring I started having serious pain in my conducting arm. My forearm and elbow would hurt like none other when I'd conduct. I knew that our friend Sam (another chiropractor) had helped Gordon with pain like this in the past, so I went to see him. After some serious bruising and intense pain sessions, my arm is better.

During one of the visits, he told me he wanted to take a look at my lower back. (I guess I just have "that look" about me.) He did some decompression therapy on my lower back, and told me that my muscles were extremely tight back there. I figured we'd work on it and it would be fine.

Right after I left Sam's office, I went to Wal-Mart to do some shopping. Five minutes in to my shopping, I went completely numb. More numb than I've ever been before. I felt like I was wearing clown shoes, and it was all I could do to keep going. I went back the next week to Sam's office and told him what happened. He ordered x-rays to see what's going on.

Right about that time I left for my trip to Utah and didn't get the x-rays done. I still continued to go numb about 1-2 times a week. In addition to the numbness, my leg muscles grow EXTREMELY fatigued after walking a short distance. I know I'm not in the greatest shape, but I should be able to walk farther than the parking lot to my room without growing so tired that I feel like I can't take another step. I knew that something more was wrong.

I Googled my symptoms. (I adore Google!) All of my symptoms seem to point towards something called "lumbar stenosis," which basically means my spinal cord is being choked to death. Knowing my history, with the radiation treatments in that area and all, it makes a lot of sense. I also have a mild case of osteoporosis, which also accounts for the deterioration of the bones in my spine.

I went to see my primary care doctor (whom I also adore) and she was very concerned about my symptoms and ordered an MRI right away. If this deteriorates much more I'll lose control of my bowels. Not cool. Definitely DON'T want that to happen!

There are several things that can be done for this, if in fact it turns out to be lumbar stenosis. The first step is physical therapy and cortisone injections. The next step is surgery to open up the cavity where the spinal cord is located. Given my age, this may be the most logical step. We'll have to wait and see what the MRI says, but it's so good to know that we're "on the case."

I am so grateful for a wonderful doctor who listens and is concerned about me. Sometimes I feel like such a whiner when I go in and see her, but she never makes me feel that way. I definitely don't want to sound like a hypochondriac, but I feel that way sometimes, too. I just want to feel normal. But then again, who knows what "normal" is? I tell my students all of the time that they way they feel right now is just about as good as it gets. :)

I'm also grateful for good health insurance. In this time of debate over the current insurance situation, it makes me truly frightened for what could be. I don't pretend to understand it all, but I enjoy what health coverage I have now, and the freedoms it gives me to get the testing I need. I'm hoping this issue will come to a resolution soon, and it is one that will benefit all.